Romancing McAllen: Making It & Selling It...Downtown's Gone Tri...Some Now Call It Little Monterrey...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

McALLEN, Texas - Downtown here has been All-Mexico, All-The-Time for years. Shops geared toward the Mexican trade dominate buildings and land where once Anglo-McAllen traded. Today's Main Street looks very much like the old, calmer Reynosa, Mexico of the 1980s and early 1990s.

Once proud stores such as Woolworth and Terry Farris and JC Penney which occupied prime real estate on the city's main drag have been replaced by electronic shops, bridal outlets and  discount clothing stores that are seemingly frequented only by shoppers from Mexico. There is Gilberto's on 15th Street near the new bus station, and there's Hollywood Fashions up toward the intersection of Austin Street. The yellow-splashed La Mordida Mexican Restaurant is two doors east, not far from a money exchange business. On a recent Saturday afternoon, downtown McAllen looked very much like downtown Monterrey. The hustle and bustle of Mexican shoppers jabbering with each other as they made their way past stores blaring Mexcian music is as much a part of the scenery as are the many vehicles sporting Mexican license plates.

It's an occupation of sorts for the City of Palms.

McAllen has opened its arms as wide as it can open them to welcome all Mexican trade. At the corner of 15th and Austin streets, a vacant building is being offered for lease. The realtor's sign notes that the building is "in the Entertainment District," and the metal being used to frame a new front door overhang says, "Arco Metal. Hecho en Mexico." Made in Mexico. That's right, and likely paid with income generated from the numerous Mexican shoppers. Soon, it appears, it will be yet another of the entertainment district's many bars, clubs and eateries.

Indeed, it is impossible to move about McAllen without sensing that you're among moving crowds of Mexican nationals in their country. They're everywhere, at the mall, the movies, the restaurants, the car dealerships, the health clubs, the tennis courts, the spas and, yeah, the Botox clinics. In exchange for throwing the border door wide-open for them, McAllen receives hefty sales tax revenues other Rio Grande Valley communities can only dream about.

Is McAllen just the lucky city in the RGV? Or has McAllen, unlike Harlingen or Brownsville gone all-out to take the lead in boosting its economy with cash coming in from the south. Mexico is going through Drug Cartel hell, and many Mexicans are not only driving across the river to get away from the fear and danger, but also to outright relocate. McAllen's population is listed as 106,000 on the city limits signs. On any given day, it swells by more than 40,000. Saturday is a business gangbusters day at La Plaza Mall on South 10th Street, where the Mexican shopper mingles with locals.

Downtown, it is largely the Mexican crowd. Few locals shop the Main Street stores, and fewer even know of the action at the bus terminal, where locals using that sort of transportation go to buy a ticket that'll take them to San Antonio and Mexicans a ticket on a bus bound for San Luis Potosi. The spacious bus station lobby is a veritable scene out of a bus terminal in any large Mexican city. Flinty, mustachioed men in straw hats, wearing ostrich-skin boots and matching belts funnel in and out all day. Physically-eccentric women in tight jeans and hefty bottoms drag their kids to the ticket counter, arriving to pay the fare with a string of questions. Near the snack store on the side of the station facing Austin Street, a woman wearing flip-flops adorned with the Chivas futbol logo grabs a pastry, a bottle of water, and five Lotto tickets. I marvel at the ant-like movement inside the terminal, marvel because it is a sort of organized arriving parade of humanity. It is the counter dealing in tickets to Mexico that is busiest, far outworking the one for Greyhound buses headed north, in the opposite direction.

That McAllen has opened its arms for all-things-Mexico is no longer in doubt. Mayor Richard Cortez speaks positively of the historic relationship at every opportunity. Mexican citizens in town is nothing new. The city's history on that is clear: It is what it is. End of discussion. Indeed, the Mexican flag has joined those of Texas, Canada and the U.S. on the four flapoles in front of the bus station.

Nothing wrong with that. Clashes of culture happen elsewhere.

Here, it is an arranged marriage that seems to be working...

- 30 -

The Tribune Will Not Be Endorsing Any Area Candidate For Elected Office...Voters Ought To Educate Themselves...

By RICARDO KLEMENT
Staff Writer

BROWNSVILE, Texas - After careful consideration, The Tribune has decided it will not endorse any area candidate or incumbent seeking elected office. The decision is in keeping with its historical stance.

"We simply believe endorsements enable these public servants to believe they are being selected to do everything but serve," said Tribune Editor Patrick Alcatraz. "The people will vote without our suggestions, and that's the way it should be. Endorsements are part of our national tradition ahead of elections, but, around here, politicians see it as some sort of license to be assholes."

The Tribune, however, trusts that all eligibile voters turn out on Tuesday to cast their votes for the candidate of their choice. In the Rio Grande Valley of Texas, where we reside, it is important that all go to the ballot box. Political sophistication includes the idea that a good citizen will educate himself/herself on the issues and on the people posting themselves for election.

"We would be more inclined to not endorse, but merely note those candidates we feel are not doing the people's work," Alcatraz went on. "Perhaps that would be a better contribution from our area news outlets. We just don't see much criticism from the news media, other than when yet another shameless, Valley elected official is arrested for wrongdoing. So, no, The Tribune will not be telling you this or that candidate is the one for the job. They simply need to do it..."

- 30 -

The Word of Reason:...Harlingen City Commissioner Robert Leftwich Addresses The Tony Chapa Mess...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

HARLINGEN, Texas - More and more, people here are saying it is now very much like the final note of the last waltz. The opera that has been the Tony Chapa blogging experience is losing endorsements right & left. And, worse yet for him, there are those who say he has singlehandedly made room for the hated Old Guard to become the Right Guard, exhibiting the Midas Touch in reverse with every story and senseless attack he offers on MyHarlingenNews.com.

Now comes this from one of his acknowledged most-trusted allies, City Commissioner Robert Leftwich, shown in photo above: "Believe it or not, I was one of the first persons to give Tony advice about cutting down on his bias and rhetoric."

We had fired-off an Email to the popular commissioner, asking him if he, as a public servant, could stomach Chapa and his vicious, anti-social approach to offering news & information to the community.

Leftwich went on: "Do I approve of his attacks, no. But as you have written yourself, he has his agenda and is entitled to it. I believe I've read where you have also written that he also has his place as a blogger, like him or not."

Yes, The Tribune has supported Chapa's right to publish a blog, just like we support any news & info venue out to help society. But Chapa has gone over the cliff, and his site is no longer credible, no longer relevant. To be sure, it is Chapa who has given up his place on the high road, traded it in for his misguided belief that reader comments - any comment - indicates he is drawing attention. He isn't, and we suspect he knows it.

Leftwich distances himself diplomatically: "I proclaim to be only an advocate of the people. Some have said those are the crazy of this town. Those of us in the good fight have never been accused of being on the same page, unlike the 'establisment,' thus the rag-tag bunch of crazy people will continue to limp along self-destructing, limiting our effectiveness."

That fight we support. There is something to be said for waging honorable battle. But to merely take cheap shots at people opposed to your political point-of-view shows a remarkable lack of class. Who will follow a fool? Only another fool.

We have met Mssr. Leftwich and he strikes us as a public servant out to do good things for Harlingen. The Tribune has written such on several occasions, including our recent story on area public servants we belief have the people in mind. For him to continue supporting Chapa's crude inanities would not reflect kindly on the commissioner many say could be the city's next mayor.

In the world of politics, you can never defend the indefensible. It is the literal mangrove swamp no politician ever wants, or needs. Tony Chapa's MyHarlingenNews has no defense for what it is doing.

Commissioner Leftwich seems to know that...

- 30 -

THE LAST TRIAL: In McAllen, A Lawyer Who Fell From Grace With His Profession...Allen Odum Dead...

[EDITOR'S NOTE: This story was initially published last May. Allen Barry Odum, the subject of the story, died on Monday. His funeral was held today. We recall him as a good friend and fellow coffee shop hangabout. He was 62. The cause of death was cancer...]

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

McALLEN, TX - Several weeks ago, at my favorite coffee shop here, one of my friends sat up and pointed to the man in the photo above, saying something about how we might be interested in inviting him to our little gang. His manner was calm, like that of someone who'd been someplace awful and was now back. In his free hand, he always carried either a popular novel or a notebook, his laptop strung across a shoulder in its bag, his other hand occupied by his cup of coffee. You see all kinds at this particular coffee shop, from Chief of Police Victor Rodriguez to County Judge Rene Ramirez to overly-dressed businessmen to bums. I had taken to saying everyone in the shop likely had a good story to tell.

This slim, gray-haired man did.

His name is Allen Odum. And if you were in this town back in November, 2008, you likely read in The McAllen Monitor about he had been arrested at the U.S. Border Patrol checkpoint near Falfurrias. The charge would be transporting of marijuana, some 60 lbs. for which he was being paid $2,400 for the trip from McAllen to Corpus Christi. It was a fall from grace for the well-known attorney.

Odum, shown in photo above, is waging a losing battle against cancer, but he has one more task to accomplish: he is writing a memoir, one whose beginning is a heart-tugger. And he'll tell you openly, never once painting his problems with any sort of self-pity. The anecdote that serves as send-off for his book is this one: His daughter had tired of seeing him lose interest in his profession, as had his employees, so much so that one day she took her red lipstick to a sliding glass door mirror in the family home and wrote about how Odum had once been a good father, a respected attorney and someone to be proud of. "Now," wrote the kid, "...you're just a crackhead."

Odum says it in a matter-of-fact tone, yet acknowledges that it hurt to see that scribbled in big, red lettering.

The arrest took him to a jail in Rockport, north of Corpus Christi, where he awaited his trial. Odum recalls he had no illusions about skirting a stay in prison. He just knew he didn't feel well as the days moved onward. The cancer diagnosis, he feels, led to the judge handing in a three-year probation, which was optimistic in that his doctors have given him little to make him think he'll see 2011. And so, Allen Odum writes. And he sends me his chapters. I look them over and note my review in a subsequent Email reply. In the mornings, he pops into the coffee shop during the early hours when I am there and we talk about his story, his writing, his memoir.

"At least, it'll be something to leave behind," he says, only his eyes and voice tell me there is more than just a desire to jot down his back pages. His fall from grace is rarely discussed. He knows he blew it and he knows there isn't much that he can do about it now. It is, however, a good story, especially when he recounts the details of his involvement in the drug trafficking, the bitching he got from clients he neglected, the shame he found when facing friends in the local legal profession.

"Duardo," he tells me when I get up to leave. "...thanks, man. You don't know how much I appreciate your help and your way of motivating me to finish this book."

I never tell him it's a bear to complete. I never tell him the first and last 50 pages are the easiest to write in any book. I never tell him about the publishing clock, which is slow. I never tell him anything negative. A book, even a non-fiction effort, is a monumental climb up an unforgiving mountain. Allen Odum will likely tire of it and greet me with words of failure. I know it. But I'll smile and say this: "You're not even writing that book; it's writing itself."

And he'll stop and think about that a few seconds before nodding, run his hand through his hair as he often does, and want to shake my hand. He'll keep writing. He'll finish his book. You can't beat Life. And you can't beat writing. You just can't...

- 30 -

The Rise of Harlingen Birthers...They Want Answers...Is Tony Chapa A Mexican?...He's Not Talking...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

HARLINGEN, Texas - Is it even important? Does it matter if local Blogger Tony Chapa is not an American citizen. We could not care less, but many in this town of 74,000 patriotic residents wonder about it daily. Some even say, in posts submitted to other blogs, that they believe Chapa is a Mexican national.

And now, he has been asked to post his birth certificate.

Chapa, operator of MyHarlingenNews.com, is hanging low, being mum, not answering the question. He should post a copy of his birth certificate and silence the critics, or he should come out of the closet and acknowledge that he is from, uh, there. It's no Big Deal, unless he's not an American citizen. In these hell-fire days of raging politics, it would not be cool for Tony Chapa to incessantly rag on some local elected officials if he's not a citizen.

Is that what Harlingen is telling Mssr. Chapa?

He's not talking.

At last check, the "comments" section of his Blog is full of Tony Chapa self-aggrandizing musings, with himself and with some urchin who identifies himself as Jake. It wasn't that long ago that he counted 40 to 50 comments for every story he posted. It is a tremendous, humbling fall from relevance. Suddenly, nobody cares about Chapa, or about his lifeless Blog. Were this a Porno movie, we'd say the star has lost his dick, or seen it shrink.

For Chapa, the opposition always is a sky full of heartless, blood-thirsty vultures. They want to kick his tail, only Chapa won't come out. He's bunkered and that's where he's gonna be. It would take, we are led to say, a giant shovel to find any evidence of Tony Chapa. Tales of his being accosted at city hall abound. Something about a heavyset man yelling at him at the last City commission meeting, and Tony merely taking it.

But, really, what we say to Mssr. Chapa is that he post his birth certificate, or address the citizen issue with a "yes or no." Until then, he will be seen as an outsider, and, worse yet, an outsider from crazy Mexico.

It's the roiling novela in town. Is dwarfish Danny deVito in it? Think so.

As another day breaks in town, the nagging question being asked is: Will Tony ante-up his birth certificate? Will his critics stay with the barrage? Will things be different tomorrow?

Naaaaaaah. MyHarlingenNews is toast, as they say at Waffle House. Day-old toast and fading. Is there anyone who will rise with Tony Chapa? Is there any Harlingenite who will lift a hand to help him up? Doesn't look like it.

We're not losing sleep over his demise. We actually wish Chapa good luck, mainly because our liberal sensibilities don't allow us to see a man being kicked silly while he's down. It's become an ugly sight.

Tony, Tony, Tony. Throw the Goddamned towel...

- 30 - 

DEATH OF A BLOG:...How Harlingen's Tony Chapa Lost His Groove...Empty Bus On A Darkened Road...Doing The Right Thing...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Shorts

HARLINGEN, Texas - Who says, we are driven to wonder, this city of 74,000 fun-starved souls can't ever get together on anything? Au contraire, mon frere. Harlingen has come alive to bury a Blog that not that long ago was kicking arse in town.

The Blog? MyHarlingenNews.com.

But it seems its operator, one Tony Chapa, went on something of a flight across perhaps the warring sands of Egypt, picked up this idea that everybody was against him back home and, voila!, he was soon at war against the entire community, save a handful of loyal pals. If a blog can ever be a bus, well MyHarlingen News.com is an empty bus. Where once it counted a large number of visitors and commenters, it now is a mere shadow of its once-en fuego bravado. Gone are the many bloggers who arrived daily to join him in spats, praise and inanity. The insane were as welcome as was the town's however-tiny intelligentsia. These days, and we have been keeping an eye on Chapa's blog for this very reason, he counted less than five "comments" on his latest offerings.

So, what happened? Can a Blog be so easily dismissed?

Critics charge Chapa with the Bogger's worst disease: censorship. And Chapa did censor right & left, killing comments he did not like and comments from people he did not like with a butcher's vigor. Today, it's hard to tell if anybody is visiting MyHarlingenNews.com, and some in town have begun to issue death certificates that they say come with a road map to the city cemetery. Not that we at The Tribune believe Chapa will fold his tent and quit the game.

But just how long can a Blog go without reader interest?

We know Chapa and would advice him to be a bit contrite, to circle his wagons while he figures out a way to return gracefully to the world of community, to re-gain the high ground on which his ambitious blog was born. News venues are needed in Harlingen. A Blog on every corner would be the best thing that could happen to Harlingen, a city currently in the throes of its own self-inflicted demise.

Will Tony Chapa eat his humble pie and once again join the civilized flock? Or is his anger so strong that there really is no way back for him? Saying "I'm sorry," or saying "I was wrong" is a tough for any man.

Still, there is a certain class in admitting you blew it. Wasn't it in middle school that teachers taught you about saying "I'm sorry" to the little girl whose pigtails you yanked out in the playground. Harlingen is Tony Chapa's little girl, and he can certainly acknowledge his actions for what they were. The little girl that is his hometown may just accept his apology...

- 30 -

Election Central:...Something's Up, But What?...Is This Really Election Week?...How Can You Tell?...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

BROWNSVILLE, Texas - Bill Clinton is coming to town. It'll be a little Early Christmas for the 120,000 lost souls who call this falling town home. Clinton, the former president, is bringing needed life to a local election that has had all the drama of a popularity contest over at the neighborhood nursing home.

Is this really Election Season?

Clinton's swooping in to support fellow Democrat Solomon P. Ortiz, the congressman from Corpus Christi up the coast. Ortiz has no competition to speak of, other than a pajama-addicted Republican no one has taken seriously. There will be other local Dems with Clinton at the city's Veterans Park rally - notables such as county judge candidate John Wood and perhaps even State Sen. Eddie Lucio, a public servant known to bop into a social gathering just because...

The former president's star power is a breadth of fresh air for Rio Grande Valley of Texas politics. To date, in this long season of posturing and lying, the expected gloss has been, well, missing. Does anyone really get excited at seeing Solomon P. Ortiz in person? Perhaps his wife, but who knows? This is a guy whose name should be Rigo M. Ortiz, the true-to-life personification of a stiff. Word is Ortiz serves his district as little as possible, and then serves himself with decidely more vigor. Yeah, it seems Hispanic politicians are now as sophisticated as their Anglo colleagues. Free travel? Si! A larger slice of the pie for me? Si, si!!

It's almost here, and yet this Nov. 2nd election brings way-too many yawns. Nothing stands out in any RGV politician up for election. Nothing. Wood is challenging incumbent Carlos Cascos for the position of county judge, yet what is it about these two men that spreads the color of fog across Cameron County. Cascos, a rare & lost Hispanic Republican, will not greet Bill Clinton. Wood should be there, beaming through that worm-like mustache.

Ah, but as they say here, what the Hell? Still, Clinton's visit is something. He could easily be elsewhere, maybe drawing a bigger crowd in Florida or New York. But Brownsville it will be.

"At least we'll know we're alive," said one resident who openly acknowledged living in a part of the world where everybody's face looks like 75 miles of bad road...

- 30 -

Without Yanks, This Year's World Series Will Be Crap...Where's Dick Young?...Texas Rangers?...Boring...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

McALLEN, Texas - In the late-1980s, after he'd made something of a name for himself with the lowly Texas Rangers, infielder, and fan favorite, Toby Harrah was traded to the New York Yankees. In Gotham City, Harrah never could duplicate his hitting prowess and was subsequently benched. His career soon ended, but it was a column by New York Daily News sportswriter Dick Young that sparked a bit of adios anger from Harrah.

Young, known as Big Dick in New York writing circles, penned a column saying Harrah's batting woes had come as a result of his "shacking up" with some broad in the Bronx. I thought about Dick Young after the hated Texas Rangers whipped my NY Yankees last night and now head for the World Series next week. I'm not much of a Sports Section reader in the Rio Grande Valley, mainly because the local sportswriters largely are "homers;" that is, they cheer for the hometeams and disdain objective reporting.

But Dick Young, shown in photo above, didn't take crap from anybody. He sparred with hyper-linguist Howard Cosell, Muhammad Ali and every uppity athlete who found himself in his crosshairs. Young died in 1987, yet his work has gained stature even in death.

Wrote one New York Times sportswriter: "With all the subtlety of a knee in the groin, Dick Young made people gasp...He could be vicious, ignorant, trivial and callous, but for many years he was the epitome of the brash, unyielding yet sentimental Damon Runyon sportswriter."

Does any wannabe sportswriter in the RGV fit that description? These are kids around here, sportswriters who are barely gaining their stripes. Can you imagine Young covering this mess involving area high school football players smoking Marijuana and drinking booze until they go completely stupid? Good Night, Irene.

This year's World Series may be the most underwhelming of all time, especially if the San Francisco Giants beat the Philadelphia Phillies and get to meet Texas. SF vs. Texas? Boring! No, the World Series never is the World Series without the Bombers. Baseball history is on my side.

But perhaps I'd be okay if only Dick Young covered the damned thing. It is the equal of seeing Gonzo Journalist Hunter S. Thompson cover our national politics. A no-bullshit interview of Brownsville Mayor Pat Ahumada by Thompson? Priceless literature...

- 30 -

10 Hours On South Padre Island...Los Fresnos Is A Rural Hoot...We Love Port Isabel's Energy...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

SOUTH PADRE ISLAND, Texas - It is by any measure of the word "lost" the only rib of sand in the Rio Grande Valley of Texas that can offer genuine escapism from the cheap hustle & flow of the Rio Grande Valley. Every inch of ground west of here will only disappoint, if not hurt you. It is true that no man is an island, yet, here on the lip of the Gulf of Mexico, one can get the feeling that the island will block-off the Valley's more-horrible vistas. In search of something different, we journeyed here one day last week.

I was accompanied by one of this Blog's loyal commenters, a lovely lady from up Austin-way who identifies herself to you only as M. She'd come down to visit the Ol' Cowboy for a week, and the island was something she wanted to see one more time. As most who know me know, I love the road. This one is flat as a West Texas high school cheerleader, but it is still a road. Texas 100 has to be the region's loneliest highway on an early Thursday morning. Why, you can even hear the seagulls flapping wings in a welcoming symphony of sorts. Andre Rieu anyone?

The tiny city of Los Fresnos is a nothing-there blur. Obligatory car wash outfits wait on tourists heading home after a day on the island's sandy beach, a sprinkling of stores offer snacks and drinks, a few heavyset cops in cruisers park where you can't help but see them wave you by, and businesses for the locals with neat sounding names, such as the eatery Easy To Go Tacos, #3 beckon right there off the highway. A drive through Los Fresnos is very much like a drive through a brief rain, quiet and calm. You can almost hear residents speaking about the goings-on of their day. "Dad, the lettuce delivery dude is late again," I imagine an employee of the taco joint saying somewhere in the eatery's kitchen. Yeah, something familial, yet all-business - smalltown concerns, absolutely.

So we pressed on toward the island a few miles ahead, and shortly we were rolling past the small bedroom community of Laguna Vista and then into busy, busy Port Isabel. Some electrical charge or another cuts across Port Isabel. The smell moving across town is of fish and fishing bait, but the energy sweeps across the bodies and faces of its inhabitants - workabout shrimpers, tourist shop operators, seafood joint employees, transients angling for a beer, sunseekers in vehicles headed toward the Queen Isabella Causeway. It feels like a coastal town in more than just the obvious ways. Port Isabel could easily transport itself to the Massachusetts coast, or even Maine, and fit right-in, something all other Rio Grande Valley communities could never do. It strikes me that a commercial airfield in town likely would take all the business currently flying into Harlingen to the west. Maybe some day.

We make it across the Causeway and angle left on Padre Boulevard. It's your typical t-shirt shop and seafood restaurant drag, with cheap and expensive hotels lining the bay & gulf sides of the road. Nothing stands out as being spectacular, just a row of utilitarian convenience stores, gift shops and gas stations. South Padre Island is not Key West, Florida. Not even Key Largo. Not yet anyway. Aside from two tall towers off to the right as you clear the causeway (hotel), little change has come to SPI in the past 20 years. A new convention center has good acreage far up the city's main drag and sun-deck public facilities on the northern end seem to be about it. Some say the nightlife is better these days. A looksee at the natives walking around allows for quick characterizations: today's wino doesn't necessarily walk at an angle. I run into a pair of upright boozers at a convenience store halfway up the boulevard, where I also pick up a great snack deal: Two hot dogs for a dollar. The two men are arguing over who'll pay for the cigs. It's yet another hopeless lament. There they go, again.

Then it's on to the beach, where M and I sit on a sand dune and watch an oil tanker out in the gulf seemingly at rest. It doesn't move, framing itself in our line-of-sight between wind-blown seagulls looking for crackers. None has seen Jonathan Livingston lately, they all tell us, which is a disappointment. I say something about whether it's true that the gull that flies highest sees farthest (a line from the Richard Bach book), but I get nothing from the hungry seagulls. Perhaps it's the region's corn diet, I tell myself as we walk back to the car. Maize is bad for the brain, is my feeling. Clumps grow up there, taking space designed for thinking.

On our way out of town, M picks up a few T-shirts and a few flower pots at a store in Port Isabel, there in the shadows of the fabled lighthouse. The drive out of town is uneventful. I think about hooking it over to Brownsville for a beer, but decide against it. Why spoil a lovely day by spending even a second in that falling town?

Back on 100 headed west, it is Bobz World, a mirage of sorts on the right side of the highway east of Los Fresnos that blows me away. What is that monstrous thing doing there? Construction crews are putting the finishing touches on a chicken-wire framed sculpture of King Kong. A giant ape in the Valley? Something's wrong about that, I say to myself. Perhaps it's tourist business. Next year, it'll be Tarzan, eh? Big, loin-attired Tarzan at the city limits. That'll draw kiddoes from every sector in the fun-starved RGV.

We roll to the end of Texas 100 and turn right on the highway. Harlingen looms up ahead. It's a strange town singing bad tunes at midnight these days, but we'd found the Starbucks coffee shop on Tyler somewhat welcoming. A town can't be all bad if one can readily find a cup of Pike's Blend early in the morning. But it was a bit weird reading the day's Wall Street Journal in such a struggling town, very much like reading Successful Farmer magazine in, say, war-torn Matamoros.

M went back to her hometown at weekend's end, but what she said there near the end was that we'd have to do it again real soon...

- 30 -    

The Heavy Burdens Of Robert Leftwich...Harlingen Simply Won't Look To The Future...Black Clouds Loom In Town...

"Our wretched species is so made that those who walk on the well-trodden path always throw stones at those who are showing a new road..." - Voltaire

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

HARLINGEN, Texas - Suddenly, one of the hundreds of area politicians is doing something. Robert Leftwich, progressive city commissioner in this one-horse town, has gone on record as saying much needs to change here...and change quickly. And just as suddenly, local naysayers have raged against him.

Welcome to The Town That Just Couldn't Stand Itself.

Harlingen is about as low as a town can go. Good jobs are scarce. Unemployment is high. Alcohol is the city's river. Kids are being caught smoking Marijuana on weekends. Cops are being anything but cops. The mayor is missing mentally from any of the meetings aimed at finding solutions. Residents are of the cheap variety. The city's pulse is weak.

Leftwich this week took-on the city's water utility, leading the effort to remove problem boardmembers he feels simply do not have the community in mind when making decisions that have proven costly. And perhaps to be expected in the town's politically-charged atmosphere, he drew the ire of those who saw him as being pushy, uppity and a rabble-rouser. Not that Leftwich did not have his supporters. Some on his side of the ledger fought back against the naysayers, labeling them as being naive and ready for the grave.

No one disputes the fact that a monstrous, dark cloud hangs over Harlingen, one ready to drown the community in even larger problems. Sales tax revenues are down, leading some to wonder where the budget axe will eventually fall. Layoffs in the making? Without question. It is being said that the screaming from a thousand drownings will be haunting, foreboding scenes already being imagined right & left.

Leftwich's action has been seen as political grandstanding. The case could be made that he is merely the local Dutch boy with his finger in the breaking dike. Is Harlingen not believing its huge problems? Can there be residents who do not see the mess? Is analysis the answer? Is the theatre really dead?

Who knows what will next befall Harlingen?

A comatose mayor and one recalcitrant city commissioner (Ms. Marra) may stall or delay action. But action will come, because action is part of the deal. It'll come from efforts such as that exhibited this week by Commissioner Robert Leftwich, or it will come from the rain-fat clouds breaking. Apres Leftwich, Le' deluge.

Harlingen is a small town that cannot afford its people to be small...

- 30 - 

In Battle For Cameron County Judge, Candidate John Wood Is Inches Ahead Of Incumbent Carlos Cascos...

"A Republican can be shorter than a Democrat and still win an election, but never the other way around..." - Ron Mexico

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

BROWNSVILLE, Texas - The image exploded off the big television screen like some mind-whacking sight no man could ever comprehend. Well, perhaps only in the height-challenged Rio Grande Valley of Texas.

There was Cameron County Judge Carlos Cascos being interviewed by Action 4 News reporter Melissa Vega on the station's evening broadcast yesterday, and danged if Republican Cascos didn't look like some dwarfish dude. How tall is this guy?

Or, well, is Ms. Vega a huge tub of a woman? Someone tell us quickly!

In our haste to be part of the most boring political race in America, we shot a note to his Democratic opponent, the erstwhile John Wood, telling him he should play the Height Card against Cascos. But, as could be expected, we got no immediate reply. Someone could be heard in the background saying something goofy to the sexy-voiced woman talking to me on the telephone, something that sounded like, "We never, ever talk to The Tribune. Hang up the fuckin' phone!"

So, we're not on Wood's list of favorite advisors. But we're cool. It's just that we were flummoxed by the sight of Cascos standing alongside Ms. Vega (shown in photo above) and looking like an off-duty clown for the Circus Vargas. How can Macho-fueled Cameron County stand a chubby shorty for county judge? How tall was former Judge Gilberto Hinojosa? You telling me he got his ass kicked by Carlos Cascos? Noooooooo. That is the, uh, height of absurdity!

So, we'll see what John Wood pulls out of his top hat in the final days leading up to the November 2nd election. It won't be a rabbit, that's for sure. It'll likely be a yardstick, which he'll carry around when seeking votes to note the height difference between him and Cascos.

In a man's world, every inch counts...

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[EDITOR'S NOTE:...Cameron County Judge Carlos Cascos is shown in photo atop this story in the company of the Brownsville police chief and Mayor Pat Ahumada. Cascos is at far right, the shorter of the three men...]

Rumors Move Across The Local Geography in County Politics...Has John Wood Applied For a Job At Banana Republic?...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

BROWNSVILLE, Texas - The insider spoke in hushed tones, careless whispers that bounced off the shag carpeting and never the walls inside campaign headquarters. It was getting late in candidate John Wood's dogged drive to win the race for Cameron County Judge. Antsy was the word of the day here this morning.

WWJWD?

Yeah, what will John Wood do? After the contest, we mean. Chances are very good that he will lose to incumbent Carlos Cascos on November 2nd, and so we were asking about Wood's future. And then one of his campaign workers, a naive-looking man with nothing to lose, said it: "John's submitted an application at Banana Republic at the Mercedes outlet mall."

Now, we asked ourselves: Do we have that on good authority? The outlet mall, popular as it is in the poverty-stricken Rio Grande Valley of Texas, has no reputation as a cemetery for losing political aspirations. John Wood working as a salesman at Banana Republic seemed plausible, but we could not help but wonder.

We tried sitting the mustachioed Wood down for an interview, tried all damned day. But his spokeswoman kept telling us he was taking a nap, and then it was something about Wood taking a shower, and then it was something about Wood catching up with the county doings by sitting at his computer to read the day's offerings at MyLeaderNews.com - Harlingen's no-nonsense Blog. In any case, he never came out of his office, and it would have been something, say, to see Brownsville City Commissioner Melissa Zamora pop-in just so that we could ask her what the Hell she's doing helping his doomed campaign. But she never showed, as they used to say in All-Nude bars of the 1970s.

So, we drove to Mercedes and hung-out at the expansive outlet mall's food court for a sandwich and chips before going-off to look for the Banana Republic store. There, we were told all Summer clothing was at half-price and that men's blue jeans could be had for an additional 10% off the price tag. For a second, we could imagine John Wood working in this store, hounding customers, smiling his ass off, being cordial and helpful, just to make a sale, yeah.

There was something musty about the aroma inside the store. Perhaps that was why...

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Clarence Thomas & The Strange Woman He Married...He's a Sex Pervert; She's a Sex Pervert's Pal...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

McALLEN, Texas - Clarence Thomas, that lost Black-American who for some strange reason finds himself on the U.S. Supreme Court, married a stupid, White woman. Her name is Virginia, and we gladly show her in the photo above seated alongside her stud.

Why do we do this?

Because this past weekend, Virginia Thomas called Anita Hill and left this message on her answer telephone: "I just wanted to reach across the airwaves and the years and ask you to consider something. I would love you to consider an apology sometime and some full explanation of why you did what you did with my husband. So give it some thought and certainly pray about this and come to understand why you did what you did. OK, have a good day."

Talk about opening old wounds. This one takes the cake.

Anita Hill, shown at right, is the lawyer who accused Clarence Thomas of playing sexual jokes on her in the years ahead of his 1991 nomination to the Supreme Court. Those hearings rank up there with the Nixon-hanging Watergate hearings in Washington, D.C. lore. Who can forget Hill's appearance before the confirmation committee? Not I, said the reporter.

Hill accused Thomas of making sexually suggestive comments to her when Hill had worked for Thomas at the Education Department and the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. She told the committee of being subjected to sexually-explicit commentary from Thomas, and of finding Black Man pubic hair on her soda cans when she'd return to her desk after meetings with clients.

That Virginia Thomas now wants an apology from Hill is absurd. Clarence Thomas, the least intelligent of the nine Supreme Court justices, never denied the allegations, saying only that he was being subjected to a "lynching" by having the hearings include Anita Hill and her damaging comments about his behavior.

Virginia Thiomas should thank her maker that Clarence is not in jail.

To her credit, Anita Hill has issued a brief statement about the telephone call, saying she has no intention of apologizing. Virginia Thomas is shameless in this latest episode. Her stud can never erase the horrible imagery left by Hill's dramatic testimony. And although he was ultimately confirmed to the seat on the nation's highest court, he remains a man tainted by the worst of accusations.

Clarence Thomas is a Republican - an Oreo of the first order...

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WORLD EXCLUSIVE:...UFOs Reported In Zapata County...Could David Hartley's Disappearance Be An Alien Abduction?...

By IGNATIUS BECERRA
Staff Writer

ZAPATA, Texas - Guarded authorities here are downplaying reports of unidentified flying objects buzzing nearby Falcon Lake in the dead of night, sightings that more than a few fearful residents believe may be connected to the recent murder of David Hartley. Many believe Hartley was abducted by space aliens, and not gunned down by Mexican drug cartel thugs, as has been reported in the press.

Hartley was supposedly shot last month by Mexican pirates who attacked him and his wife as they scooted across the popular lake's waters aboard Jet-skis. His body has never been found, even though his wife Tiffany told police she saw the attackers firing automatic weapons at her as she fled the brazen killing. Hartley's Jet-ski also has not been found.

Skittish cops here will not confirm the UFO sightings, and they are not ready to say Hartley was taken aboard the alien aircraft (shown in photo above) and whisked-off to some faraway planet. But talk to residents and be treated to stories of weird numbing sounds moving across the region late at night, and of lights streaking and then not streaking across the darkened Zapata County sky.

"They're here," said an old woman who said she has lived her entire life in the county. "I now know UFOs are real. And if you ask me, yes, it's very possible they took that young man from McAllen (Hartley). But don't expect our sheriff or anyone in town to say UFOs visit us, 'cause they always worry about our fishing tourism being hurt by any little, Ol' negative thing."

The object is described as a flying wing dark blue-black in color, with gigantic light orbs set below the wing's V-shaped areas. One eyewitness, who admitted he'd been drinking Tequila, reported hearing what sounded to him like "a reverb. You know, like on an electric guitar amplifier of the sort you see onstage." This latest UFO, he added, was his second such sighting.

"The other one was sort of cigar-shaped, man," he said. "It scared the Beejeezus out of me, cause it was, like, flying in on me and I thought I'd be beamed aboard. I was ready for it, but it scared the Hell out of me."

Dr. Alan Hynek, director of the government's Project Blue Book, which monitors UFO sightings, said, "As a scientist, I must be mindful of the past; all too often it has happened that matters of great value to science were overlooked because the new phenomenon did not fit the accepted scientific outlook of the time."

According to a spokesperson for the federal agency, Hynek was on his way to Falcon Lake with a team of department experts to take soundings of the lake bottoms and explore area treetops for burns. Mexican officials, meanwhile, also were expected to cooperate with the UFO expert. According to a source, Mexico cited a lack of any evidence in saying they believe David Hartley was likely abducted by a spaceship, and never was the victim of Mexican drug pushers. The Zapata County Sheriff's office declined to comment on the Hartley case, or on the reports of UFO sightings.

"Haven't seen'em muhself, nope," said a cigar-chomping man eating enchiladas at a local cafe...

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In The Valley, No Time For Big Time News...National Politics Not Our Expertise...Screw The Readers...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

HARLINGEN, Texas - Smalltown newspaper people like to tell you that all news is local, that they don't give a damn about national or international events, that the money to be made is local money. That is why you are more likely to see an advertisement from the local used-car dealership in your hometown paper than you will, say, an Ad for fancy watches sold only in New York.

And that's fine.

But when the country is falling apart, or, more correctly, being torn to shreds from coast to coast, well, one would think that, yes, what happens in Vegas doesn't have to stay in Vegas. There are a dozen or so wild political contests being waged from Delaware to California, contests that pit witches against tired and old white men and contests in which one woman seeking the governorship of La-La Land is blowing $150 million of her own cash.

You'd never know it reading the Valley Morning Star here. This newspaper seems to be the darling of the Winter Texans and the venue for lightweight neighborhood news. But it's no different in Brownsville downrange, where The Herald is known more for what it ignores than for what it covers. Same for The McAllen Monitor on the western end of the Rio Grande Valley of Texas, where you'll find more national news than in any page of its two aforementioned sister newspapers, but it'll be cut and buried in the inside pages.

So, what is it with the region's news media?

Why won't these three dailies enter the fray at a time when every American citizen ought to be engaged in this burning national debate about the horrible economy, the terrible wars across the Atlantic, the indefatigable immigration mess, the insanity of the extremists Far-Right politicians arriving as members of the Tea Party, the unresolved flirtation that is the Gay issue? Can a community such as this one move across the universe as if alone in its provincial miasma? Should we worry about it?

The Valley Morning Star here is a shell of a daily newspaper. These days, it sails or hangs on the legs of a small number of novice reporters, most of whom, says one city commisioner, do not have the smarts to tackle to the doings at City Hall. But, we ask, did they ever? Much of the blame falls on the citizenry's inability to demand better news coverage. Harlingen does not. It merely putters alongside the Morning Star's unambitious tune, obliviously waltzing to nothingness.

In Brownsville, The Herald is no better. Indeed, the starving community's three citizen Blogs exist primarily to launch biting salvos at it, to note deficiencies, to shine the light on its mistakes, to wonder why it continues to publish, to damn the damned thing. In response, The Herald says & does nothing. Its flight pattern is that of a cropduster, swooping up and down, mostly down. At the top of the list of stories it has ignored is the bloody war across the Rio Grande in Matamoros, a Mexican bordertown whose geography literally laps up to Brownsville's downtown underbelly. For a more-ambitious outfit, this neighboring war would mean covering the hell out of it and earning a national reputation as a border newspaper-of-record. The Herald is not so inclined. Instead, it makes its daily bread off stories about outlaw massage parlors and a local government effort to rid the town of plastic bags at the grocery store. By all rights, it should be the company's flagship newspaper, but it isn't - and that seems to be okay with the management and the reporting staff.

In McAllen, The Monitor sashays along on a better-paved road. It will undertake investigative reporting, only that does not come along as often as the local state-of-affairs demands. The western fringe of the Valley it serves is a motherlode of stories to do with crime, from the one fueled by the ever-threatening drug cartels in ungovernable northern Mexico, to stupid cops in Starr County, to political corruption rivaling the one found in rotting Mexico across the nearby river. It, too, has largely ignored the national noise. You'll find a write-up every now and then, but more often than not it'll be an editorial or a guest column previously published by a major newspaper. It would seem that The Monitor also is of the opinion that, well, local opinions have no place in Big Time politics.

And to that, we say: "Que lastima..."

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Harlingen's Big Event:...Town That Dreads Sundown To Party With Warring Blogger Jerry Deal...

By DENNIS HOPPER
Special to The Tribune

HARLINGEN, Texas - Ever since the tire outlet Western Auto left town, this community of some 74,000 souls has lived a life shorn of fun and revelry. It's been forever, in other words.

Now comes next Thursday evening.

It'll be sometime after 6:30 p.m. at Chuck's Ice House when many area folks and pseudo-celebrities will gather that day to party with local Blogger Jerry Deal of MyLeaderNews.com fame. The old codger, both loved and hated in his own town, will be celebrating his second 39th birthday in the company of some notable people. Unconfirmned guests include the disgraced baseball player Jose Canseco (shown in A's uniform photo) and the body of former border bandit Juan N. Cortina.

Among the better-known residents expected to attend the wild soiree are controversial Private Dick Joe Rubio and, if a search party can find him, former Tribune Editor Eliot Elcomedor. A dozen or so lesser-known locals are also on the invitation list, including several reporters for The Valley Morning Star.

Missing from the list is Deal's blogging nemesis Tony Chapa of MyHarlingenNews.com, as is El Rocinante's Jerry McHale, as is Ed Shultz of MSNBC, as is Ana Nicole Smith.

Cortina's appearance is being handled by the operators of the Matamoros Wax Museum, which has promised to drive the border bandit's body to the party and set him up for photographs alongside a fake palm tree. Efforts to get KVEO commentator Ron Whitlock to do the same were unsuccessful. An employee for the Brownsville TV station (Channel 23) noted Whitlock is still alive.

Emceeing the event will be a Freddy Fender lookalike, with the keynote speech to be delivered by Harlingen City Commissioner Kori Marra, Deal's most loyal reader. "She'll be highlighting his life with a special Powerpoint presentation, as well as raising a toast to the Old Cowboy," said a Deal pal familiar with the bash's arrangements. "It should be a real honest-to-goodness shindig, like those that celebrated Wyatt Earp's birthday."

Scheduled to represent The Tribune is Editor Patrick Alcatraz.

"I'm looking forward to being in Harlingen for Jerry Deal's birthday," said Alcatraz in an Email to this reporter. "I always go to Harlingen when I get tired of people being nice to me..."

The price of admission, this writer was told, will be your brain...

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The Toilet Paper Caper:...And Other Brain-Eating Adventures In The Lovely Rio Grande Valley...

"Maybe the night'll roll in, one of those New Mexico nights - all gold and red and blue..." - Poetry of The American West 

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief 

McALLEN, Texas - I stopped off at my favorite local coffee shop here this Ayem and chatted-up half-the-morning with one of my newfound friends, a woman from Colorado. She kept talking about how she loved watering the plants on her property, and how it sure looked like it was going to rain, and, well, she didn't like that, 'cause there would go the watering ritual. I listened and smiled, sipping my dark roast slowly and thinking about other things that moved through my brain. It's almost September. The call of The West comes around about this time when I am away from my beloved New Mexico.

The thing is I'm not a good listener of meaningless chit-chat. My friends say I use the "interrupt" feature of my annoying social skills to move the conversations along, to take them to something I care about. Rain arriving wasn't that big of a deal for me this morning. What I said to this woman in the end was that she could always go ahead and water her plants even in the rain. She looked at me sort of sideways, as if wishing I hadn't said what I said, like she wanted to slap me upside the head and tell me to get back on her wavelength. I tend to drift a lot here in the Rio Grande Valley of Texas, mainly because I find conversational skills are lacking in pretty much everyone I meet. The subject matter people around here select as topics of conversation is too pedestrian for me. I tend to note it quickly, and bail, which was the case at a social gathering I was invited to a few weeks back. The occasion was a fundraiser for a woman dying of cancer. I stayed maybe five minutes, after feeling as if in a coffin for the first four.

Perhaps the brain evolves into something somewhat final, a place in a life when it's damned easy to ignore, to avoid, to blow-off - a place where one decides the person, the chat, the project is simply not worth the time and attention. I have a jealous brain. It quickly and clearly tells me who needs me and who doesn't. Conversely, it always lets me know what I need and want. Such brains are rare in this part of the God-abandoned world. No, brains around here are of the Quick-To-Fuck-Up variety. Case in point: A married politician from South Padre Island, a woman at that, had a portion of her adult life splashed across the area newspapers today. The story had all to do with a messy divorce that included details of what sounded like dogged-out adultery she somewhat admitted, if admitting to date of intimacy is admission. Her alleged lover is an aging married man. Tell me, what sort of brain - a brain one would expect would know its expectations - gives the okay on something like that? But there are other examples. At the same coffee shop, I asked for a blueberry muffin to munch on while I drank my coffee. The pudgy, young clerk behind the counter instead threw a blueberry oat bar in my bag. I always get my pastry in a bag. My brain tells me that is how one should eat such things in a cheap-ass border town's coffee shop. I never did seek an explanation for the pastry foul-up. Looks of full-out stupidity piss me off even more, so why bother? But it also reminded me of an incident I'll call The Toilet Paper Caper.

That one came at a local restaurant and involved a heavyset, huge-breasted woman of about 40 who stumbled into me as I entered a men's room and she exited the adjacent women's room. The crash forced her to drop her rather large purse, and that's when the two rolls of industrial toilet paper tumbled out of the purse. I stared at her. She said, in a voice known to priests at Confessional: "Sir, I swear I got them at H.E.B." My reaction was to keep walking, to then shake my head all the while my hose directed my kidneys' contents into the stand-up urinal. What sort of brain goes out to steal a Tex-Mex cafe's toilet paper?

The Rio Grande Valley brain, with few exceptions, is pea-sized, which likely explains some of the insipid bullshit I can never quite understand...

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[EDITOR'S NOTE:..This article was initially published last Summer. Strange as it may sound, all of it still applies...]

BAD BUSINESS: Why Hispanics Should Say "Thanks, But No Thanks" To Wells Fargo Banks...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

BROWNSVILLE, Texas - There was a time in the Rio Grande Valley when banks advertised their services by saying, "We're your kind of people." Hispanics knew these banks were not referring to them. Their history is written with the ink of outright, blatant racism. For Hispanics, the region's largest population, loans and financing were impossible to get from those banks for the purchase of homes, vehicles and businesses. The largest portion of the banks' business went to - and drew on - the Anglo residents

The Valley has come a long way from those segregationist (some said racist) days of the 1960s, enough anyway that many banks you now see up and down Valley streets are owned by Hispanics.

One bank dead-set on maintaining its heavy foot on Hispanic necks is Wells Fargo, a member of the nation's Big Four banks that includes Chase, Bank of America and Citigroup. Indeed, according to the government agency that monitors and regulates their business practices, Wells Fargo is the fourth largest bank in the US by assets. On top of that, Wells Fargo is the second largest bank in deposits, home mortgage servicing, and debit card. The Sioux Falls, South Dakota-based corporation is well-represented up and down the Valley.

Its 150-year existence has been marked by shenanigans. Last July, the State of Illinois sued Wells Fargo, alleging the bank steered Hispanics and African-Americans into high-cost, sub-prime loans of the sort that landed many such customers in deep trouble, so deep that many of them lost - or are losiong - their homes.

Now, Wells Fargo is refusing to re-write mortgages, even as it no doubt still recalls applying for and receiving taxpayer bailout money totaling $25 billion in 2008.

Much of the country has been clamoring for more bank regulation, citing ever-rising fees that range from cashing a check to use of its ATM machines. But now that recent times have strapped the nation's economy and forced many Americans into untenable financial straits, Wells Fargo is unwilling to ease its historically-tough collection effort. For Hispanics, Wells Fargo should represent nothing but bad news - enough anyway to force them into ending any/all business relationships with the bank.

Wells Fargo, apart from enticing Hispanics with questionable loans, is the largest investor in the GEO Group, a conglomerate that operates private prisons and immigrant detention centers across the country. Many of those prisons and detention facilities have been criticized for serious abuses of the detainees....

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Out Of Recent Candidates Debate, Harlingen Got Squat...Playing the Foolish Political Game...

By PATRICK ALCATRAZ
Editor-In-Chief

HARLINGEN, Texas - In local political circles, some saw it as a coup of sorts to see pressed-shirt Cameron County Judge Carlos Cascos walk in to debate a lackluster opponent he faces in next month's election. As reported, the crowd that gathered at the city's downtown library numbered in the 130-range, with many of those departing believing Republican Cascos had won his debate with Democratic Party candidate John Wood.

But in the days following the Tuesday afternoon debate, nothing in the form of promise or action has come to this struggling community. Not that two politicians would ever solve the town's many problems, but some could dream.

As things stand, Harlingen needs jobs, perhaps more than any other city of its size in the Rio Grande Valley of Texas. It also needs business to re-energize sales tax revenues. It needs its community elected officials to step up and at the very least say things will get better sometime soon. But it's not happening. The people who want change arrived at the debate and listened. They heard County Judge Cascos speak glowingly of things in the county, and they heard candidate Wood say much more needs to be done.

But nothing is glowing and nothing is being done.

This town's sole hope for survival lies in the promise of a hunting & fishing retail outlet many say is just not going to get the job done. Confidence has never had a worse home. There is no confidence in Harlingen. Residents are still marching to the local employment and welfare offices (see photo above) out of sheer desperation. Politicians can come in and beg for votes in an air-conditioned venue, but at what point do they turn around and help those in need? What can Carlos Cascos do for Harlingen residents? He should be held accountable; he should be asked to produce.

Communities can turn out for these political events and play their part, yet they rarely get any substantial help in return. Cascos and Wood presumably left the debate thinking they had won the parrying contest. But what goals do they have to do something for the people who put them in office, where they draw good paychecks and get fantastic benefits?

The hard times being endured by Harlingen are broad and diverse. Perhaps Cascos and Wood cannot solve all of the problems. Yet, it strikes us that something is wrong when these candidates get what they want, but do not necessarily feel the need to help those who put them in those cushy jobs.

In the Valley, politicians feel the love. They get the votes and the positions and everything that comes with it. But the last part of the equation - exactly what the community gets - is always missing. Harlingen played the part of audience for Cascos and Wood, yet it likely will get nothing from these two public servants.

That's the bitch in local politics - it's all for them...

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Forget Traditional Phone Calls, It's Cellular Photography Today's User Demands...

By ANGELO MARGARITA 
Special to The Tribune 

WESLACO - Another time, it was the Hula Hoop that captivated Americans. More recently, it's been "texting," the sending of messages over cellular telephones. Now comes "Sexting," the forwarding of erotic photographs once the private world of secretive lovers out to titillate each other with shots of dangling breasts and electric erections. 

"I get one almost every day," said a resident of this Mid-Valley community between McAllen and Harlingen. "Usually, they are not explicit photos as much as they are sexy pictures. My ex-girlfriend would send me photos of her breasts almost every night. It drove me wild, yes." But, as with third-fourth-and-fifth dates with the same woman, there's always more, more, more. 

"For me, it's gotta be total nudity or nothing," said a woman who would only give her first name, Josephine. "I need to see the whole package from my men. It's free and it's innocent. Why worry about it?" 

And it isn't just young people. "It is senior citizens, as well," said a University of Vermont professor who conducted a yearlong survey of the popular activity. "It appears sex is alive and well in America. We were surprised to find that this exchange of erotic photography has no one demographic. Kids are doing much of it, but so are adults." 

He admits to carrying "three-four shots of my wife in sexy positions." 

So, we asked: Which is the most popular photo? 

"A naked woman, for sure," he replied. "And she's always standing in front of a large mirror, the lens aimed at either her breasts or a bit lower. In men, women like what we call 'The Hang,' which says it all." 

The study also notes that most cellphone users - yes, Mom & Dad, too - carry an average of ten erotic photos...

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