Staff Writer
HARLINGEN, Texas - In the world of television, it's all about looks. Yeah, like who wants to watch some frumpy chick reading the news. I don't. Hell, I'm not against going to another channel when my local women on the network statrions around here arrive wearing the latest off the Mervyn's store racks. Yeah, I go to the Spanish channels - Univision 48 on my cable service.
They have the lookers.
Who tracks names when that blouse is just so in the middle of my TV screen. Great hair, neat, sexy voices. Ah, so exotic.
In English, I get Amateur Hour around here. I know, I know the Rio Grande Valley of Texas is the nation's 87th Television Market, the literal equivalent of what serve as small, rural towns in the world of newspapers. But, dang it, do they have to look and talk the part of overly-reserved Goobers? Action 4 News, Channel 4 based here, is the worst. Its anchors and reporters talk as if either on Valium or between meals, itching to go get something down and get back down the hall for the latest live report from the studio.
There's reporter Mary Avila telling me about something or another, putting me to sleep. I can't follow her words, 'cause it takes time and energy to slow down the brain. Her tone and speech pattern is as if meant for Alzheimer's patients at the local hospital - too sing-song, nothing to tell me she's bringing me important news. Same for Anchor Marcy Martinez. She's my pick for the Aunt Bea of the valley. More energy, Marcy! Who knows, perhaps it has something to do with sitting alongside the ever-annoying Ryan Wolf. Hey, is his studio chair behind the desk set higher than Marcy's? Looks that way. And where's Lacie Lowry? We did get a kick out of seeing her fashion varying hair styles. Is it curly today, or is it straightened? You'd think she thinks this broadcast is a soap opera. Oooooh! (Gasp)...she changed it again! BTW, is she gone? There are others.
That lanky Rafael Carranza has no idea how to translate the period in a sentence into his voice-overs or stand-up reports. He races to the end of his stories like some undocumented immigrant high-tailing it from Matamoros into Brownsville. Slow down, dude! Ever hear of inflection?
But what thrills me is to see Univision 48's weathergals. They bring home the temperature and humidity readings and make me feel as if I'm in some topless joint, unlike the matter-of-fact fashion and offerings of Action 4's Erika Flores. Jazz up that wardrobe, sweetheart! Get a clue from your brethren on Univision 48.
As for Channel 5 News, well, that crew is the best in the lowly RGV, but, man, oh, man...get rid of Rick Diaz already. Rick is the only Valley newsman who can speak with authority - first-hand knowledge - about the indictment of former Hidalgo County District Attorney Oscar McInnes, the razing of McAllen's Memorial Stadium, the building of Brownsville's Sunrise Mall, the first commercial jet landing in Harlingen, the retirement of TV personalities Larry James and Frank Sullivan, the moon landing. Diaz, however, does lend his station's news broadcast a certain Oldies-but-Goodies ambiance few Americans remember from the days of Edward R. Murrow, Frank Reynolds, Walter Cronkite and Daniel Schorr.
Yes, when Rick Diaz is on the set, Channel 5 should go black & white.
Still, for now, we're with flashy, sexy Univision. All the way, Baby...all the way...
- 30 -
7 comments:
I guess Ryan Wool qualifies as peripatetic but mostly he's just very pathetic.
ANON:...His reports on the restaurants (FOOD PATROL) are the lazy way of doing Journalism. Those health inspections he uses to storm these businesses are conducted by the cities, not Action 4 News. And his "Streets of Speed" are corny & laughable. Amateur Hour, as we noted... - Editor
I would not be surprised if an irate restaurant owner punches his lights out. I do no think having a cameraman behind you affords you any kind of protection, they can only document the confrontation and not stop any right hooks. And that's what Ryan really wants, confrontations where he can humiliate the business owner.
One of these days his wish will come true and he'll have a real confrontation where punches are going to fly.
But who knows, maybe it has already occurred, him getting punched, but that piece of tape he would be too embarrassed to broadcast.
Christian
Not only punches, but weapons..... like on that dude from
" Cheaters " Tv. program, a few years back !!!
(Amateur Hour, as we noted... - Editor)
Just an example of Wolf's amateurism. Few night ago the female slob who sits next to him said a report on Charles Rangel, and she used the spanish way to say his last name. She mentioned it several times and I noticed that Wolf looked up as if feeling embarassed for her.
Several nights later,though, Wolf had a follow up on the same black thief and he said the name as "RRRRangel", just as the fat woman had done earlier. Bottom line, channel 4 news SUCKS! And it started when they got rid of old man Larry James. JMHO.
ralphy
Sorry Ralphie, Charles Bernard Rangel anglicized his name.
He is of Hispanic extraction as his father Ralph Rangel was born in Ponce, Puerto Rico.
Now I can assure you that in Puerto Rico the name is pronounced as in Mexico, not the anglicized pronunciation he has now.
But if that's the way he want's it. so be it. It just seems that anglicizing one's name makes it appear like one is embarrassed about his ethnic background.
Christian
(He is of Hispanic extraction as his father Ralph Rangel was born in Ponce, Puerto Rico.)
Whoa! I did not know that. I thought he was just a black from the ghettos of Atlanta. And I'm the one who is sorry. Thanks for setting me straight, Chris.
ralphy
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