Special to The Tribune
MATAMOROS, Mexico - The flabby-bellied girl had just finished dancing "Have You seen Your Mother, Baby, Standing in The Shadows" by The Rolling Stones when the soldiers stormed in, ordered everyone to the floor and quickly pulled the plug on a long, long night for animals. Partying in this city, once the playground of South Texas politicians and the wandering press, has come to an end. Where strained guitar riffs once sailed out into a booze-fueled crowd, it is now bullets that zing past you even as you scan the room for a semi-attractive doll who just may be up for some free "kill me" sex in some darkened corner.
It is the ongoing war between the blood-thirsty drug cartels that has fun leaving town in a hurry. Neoned nightclubs once as noisy as Hell's reception room now sit abandoned, looking like transplants from war-ravaged Fallujah or Baghdad. Streets that once moved thousands of night owls out for a good time now settle into an epoch that has them as lonely as an aging prostitute working Penny Lane at the local bordello. It is, they say, a fight that funseekers lost, and lost badly.
He stops and scans the scenery, up ahead, to his right and left, and behind. Nothing. If there is a taco to be had on this street, well, it must be down in the sewer drains. I nod; he smiles. We are fools passing like shits in the night, bound for our own geographies. (Yes, shits, okay?)
"See you later," I say next.
"Alligator," he fires back, laughing like a hyena.
The street looms as lonely as a pregnant woman unable to have sex. I hear every moan and groan coming from below and above. If there is a God, I tell myself, he better be at the next corner. But I press onward, now thinking God is not interested. At the corner, a tamale-fattened cop stops me and asks for identification. I hand him my Tribune ID Card and he nods.
"You tell your boss I better not catch his ass in my town," he tells me, referring to Tribune Editor Patrick Alcatraz. I ask him why, and he says, "I was a big, fuckin' Ron Mexico fan. And Alcatraz fired him. For drinking on the job! Ha ha ha. We all drink on the job, man!"
I walk away, slowly. It is a cadaver's idea of night - nothing to be seen or heard. Somewhere else, the music is not stopping. People are dancing, guys are angling in on chicks and the booze is flowing as if forever.
Not here. Matamoros has died a horrible death...
- 30 -
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Writer Nick Ryan usually covers ethnic strife in Harlingen, but he'd heard all the bullshit about the drug wars in Mexico. So, he packed a bag lunch, filled his canteen with whiskey and walked across the bridge in Brownsville to check it out. This is his first report for The Tribune...]
11 comments:
I thought Toni Chapa was a man, doesn't he owns or runs a blog??? The last I heard he had sold the blog, to someone by the name of Jake, or something like that.
The Toni on the side bar, is a female.
Damn, she looks kind of hefty, well so what else is new. All the women in South Texas are, or, resemble a 4X4. Short stumpy, and overweight galore.
Let me see, Toni Chapa is suppose to be a man, but is a woman. Damn, I have heard it all.
ANONYMOUS:...Toni Chapa is definitely a woman. She suffers from bizarre mood changes and is fond of well-hung men. So, perhaps you are confusing her with someone else. Who that may be we are at a loss to say. Toni Chapa wears female clothing, silky pink underwear being a favorite. Hope that helps. Look for her story to be titled "My Fantastic Date With Harlingen Blogger Jerry Deal." It should be a weiner, er, winner... - Editor
I just read, that Tony/ Toni Chapa is exchanging words with his girl friend Jakey.
They posted 10 comments, Tony/Toni is now posting on another Harlingen Blog. He/She is trying to get something going. He doesn't get any comments, so he answers them himself, or his boyfriend/girlfriend Jackey.
Well we know, Toni/Toney can't drive, he can't write, now he has a boyfriend/girlfriend to drive him around, oh, I forgot he can't vote. And the big dawg, called him an embarrassment at at Hgn. commission meeting, and put his tail between his legs, like a real dog. And ran away.
Nick Ryan, looks like a cotton picker, or a guy who picks up repollo.
Nothing personal, but he is goofy looking.
Hey, who is this Toni Chapa, she looks scared. Is she what they call down here, illegal, does she vote, does she drive, does she know how to write sentences. Does she have a boyfriend, name Jamester or something like that.
I heard a Toney with the same last name. Was called out, and he just stared at the ground, while some big fat guy embarrassed him in front of 125 people at a meeting.
In my school days, a guy like that was called, "Gallinas'.
Patrick are you sure about Toni's history? You know, it wouldn't be the first time someone switched sides. If Chastity Bono can become Chas, surely it would be less difficult to remove a small obstacle than to create one out of nothing. There is even a resemblance don't you think? I think you should give her a spelling test and see if she can write in complete sentences. If she starts erasing your messages, that could be a sign too. Good luck. M
Tonto chapo, is trying to start controversy, he had no comments, on his trashy blog.
He is kissing ass to Deal, so he wrote some negative stuff about the Tribune.
I am still curious about, Toni Chapa, the writer.
Better be careful, she might turn to be annoying, like the male side.
Hey anon, Gallina, I have a name for him or her, how about "cobarde", viejo miedoso. No le quiso entrar al Perron.
Tonto Chapo reminds me of a cat-fish, "All mouth".
Well, fellow bloggers, time for un taquito en el Taquito rest. on north first street. Harlingen of course.
ANONYMOUSES:...We have no control over your brains, but free-lance writer Toni Chapa is a woman who, although she may bear a striking resemblance to Tony Chapa, is not the Harlingen blogger. That Tony Chapa would never allow anyone to arrest him. He would surely start throwing little punches at everyone, in a sort of pattycake-pattycake way, we're sure... - Editor
Patrick, tontito chaparron, doesn't have any brains. He thinks he does, but he doesn't.
I think we need to give Toni chapa a chance and see, how her articles turn out.
He/she, "T.C." is what another anon, wrote, es un viejo "cobarde".
Wasn't there a song called the coward of the county??
Harlingen has one to, el chapparro, tonto chaparron.
I heard ICE was looking for him, because he over stayed his visa. Es mojarrin, you mean he has a girlfriend/boyfriend, name, Jakey???
La Mesera, was dedicated to Tonto chaparron. If he is a she, then la mesera fits his style.
He is responding to someone on Deals blog, because his girlfriend Jakey, is defending him. No one reads his blog, he is out there posting numbers, he probably makes up, viejo cobarde.
Out of 8 comments 6, belong to chapparron and his girlfriend.
The flabby-bellied girl is beautiful. Who is making a criminal out of her for dancing? That's f@#% Up. Stand up for the women. Get your sh@& together now!
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