Letter From Austin: In Which One Reader Takes Two Infidels To Task...The Tribune Concurs, Yes...

By BLOGGER M.
Special to The Tribune

AUSTIN, Texas - Lately, I find myself under attack by one (or maybe I should say 1/2) blogger by the name of Tony Chapa. Since he doesn't allow free speech on his site (remember that pesky little kid when you were growing up that always stuck his fingers in his ears and chanted, "Na na na boo boo, I can't hear you") and it seems somewhat rude to interrupt other websites or stories trying to get a word in edgewise with him, I am asking that The Tribune print my response to tiny Tony, especially because I know he creeps over here to see what people are saying about him.

His most recent claim is that I have been spamming him with nasty messages that hurt his delicate feelings. He states that he knows it's me because of the server used and the IP address, even though the writer uses a different name. Although I am not surprised at all that people would send him nasty messages and call him names, I cannot take credit for any of them. I post only under my initial "M". That being said, I have no control over what anyone else in my household says to him because, after all, it is a free country, but I'm not sure he could explain or understand that term. I do find it extremely amusing that all the things Tony is whining about are tactics that he and his little toad Jake have used many times over. They go back and forth, playing with each other, with Jake using at least four different aliases, sometimes even posting as one little slime ball, but by the time he pecks out his three sentences (all with one finger) he forgets which character he came on as and signs off under another name. It really doesn't matter how many names he uses. Put all his characters together and you still don't have enough brain cells to fill the skull of a normal toad. To top it off, Jake gets all huffy, accusing Patrick Alcatraz of using different characters like that is a crime for a fiction writer to do.

Then there is this whole obsession that Tony has with Duardo Paz-Martinez and Jakey's little torch that he carries for Patrick Alcatraz. I guess I can understand how Tony might envy Duardo's ability to write professionally, especially when you see Tony's own deep personal issues with the alphabet (Yes, Tony, there really are more than 15 of those pesky little letters, and we won't even get into vowels and consonants here). What I can't understand is why Tony, who can maybe hit the 5'1'' mark as he tiptoes out of the corner convenience store keeps referring to Duardo as the "dwarf". I have met Duardo and he is at least a head taller than I, and I am 5'4". In fact, I feel fairly confident in stating that I could easily spit over the top of Tony's head without hitting anything. Of course, I could probably wouldn't hit anything if he was standing in profile and I leaned down to spit in his ear. It would sail out the other side with no impediments blocking the way.

The problem Jake has with Patrick stems from a little man-crush Jake developed. He really thought that Patrick would be overwhelmed with admiration of the slimy characters he portrays and then sent him a little "Just kidding - no hard feelings" e-mail, and when Patrick wouldn't acknowledge that Jake was anything more than the lowest form of species, Jake got all hurt and vengeful. Jake likes to go on other sites and fantasize about raping other men and even though Tony is aware of this and has even banned him in the past from his own website, Jake (and all his characters) is the only one commenting on a regular basis on Tony's site. The fact that Tony is so desperate for commenters that he will allow this disgusting pervert free rein to pollute his site with his verbal ordure speaks volumes to the hypocrisy of Tony putting in a daily Bible quotation. Jake is indeed, one sick puppy and Tony is helping him spread his filth by giving him a platform.

At any rate, this is my response to Tony Chapa and his impotent little sidekick and I want to thank The Tribune for allowing me to vent...

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[Editor's Note: Blogger M has been a regular reader of The Tribune for most of the year. And because she has been on the receiving end of much silliness from the people she mentions in her post above, well, we felt obliged to give her the floor, as they say. In any case, we agree with everything she writes...]