By LEON BROWNBONE
Staff Writer
BROWNSVILLE, TX - Absent fathers and Deadbeat Dads are in the crosshairs of a new initiative by Mayor Pat Ahumada that has them full-center on the Shame Meter.
"He's had it with deadbeat dads and he's doing something about it," said a source close to the innovative mayor. "First it was dogs and now it is dogs with two legs. What can possibly come next? I heard we now have - what? - 13,000 deadbeat dads in town. That's Brownsville, but it ain't right. No, sireeeee."
Called the Broken Field Initiative, the mayor's latest foray into the world of morality does not please everyone in this falling town of 100,000 love-starved souls. Said one man eating a plate of super-sized tacos de lengua at Lucio's Cafe this morning, "What right does the mayor have to tell me anything about my love life or my drinking ways?" The cafe patron, Cresencio "El Cell Phone" Monteagudo, went on: "Huh, what right? Tell me! You're a reporter for The Brownsville Herald-Tribune. You know it all. Tell me, what right?"
Ahumada has earned laurels and hardys from previous ideas, such as his war against animal cruelty and his steadfast defense of the border way of life. The plan to curb irresponsibility comes at a time when the city's economy has fallen to levels that mirror those in neighboring Matamoros, Mexico. "He's grasping for salvation," said Mary Magdalene Monclova, a professor of political science at an area college. "Whether this latest plan gets anywhere is anybody's guess. You doing anything for lunch, young man?"
Ahumada is set to float his idea at the next City Commission meeting. Sources say he plans to take money from the City Parks & Recreation budget to fund the deadbeat initiative.
Staff Writer
BROWNSVILLE, TX - Absent fathers and Deadbeat Dads are in the crosshairs of a new initiative by Mayor Pat Ahumada that has them full-center on the Shame Meter.
"He's had it with deadbeat dads and he's doing something about it," said a source close to the innovative mayor. "First it was dogs and now it is dogs with two legs. What can possibly come next? I heard we now have - what? - 13,000 deadbeat dads in town. That's Brownsville, but it ain't right. No, sireeeee."
Called the Broken Field Initiative, the mayor's latest foray into the world of morality does not please everyone in this falling town of 100,000 love-starved souls. Said one man eating a plate of super-sized tacos de lengua at Lucio's Cafe this morning, "What right does the mayor have to tell me anything about my love life or my drinking ways?" The cafe patron, Cresencio "El Cell Phone" Monteagudo, went on: "Huh, what right? Tell me! You're a reporter for The Brownsville Herald-Tribune. You know it all. Tell me, what right?"
Ahumada has earned laurels and hardys from previous ideas, such as his war against animal cruelty and his steadfast defense of the border way of life. The plan to curb irresponsibility comes at a time when the city's economy has fallen to levels that mirror those in neighboring Matamoros, Mexico. "He's grasping for salvation," said Mary Magdalene Monclova, a professor of political science at an area college. "Whether this latest plan gets anywhere is anybody's guess. You doing anything for lunch, young man?"
Ahumada is set to float his idea at the next City Commission meeting. Sources say he plans to take money from the City Parks & Recreation budget to fund the deadbeat initiative.
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6 comments:
Well, well, look who is talking about morality. Isn't the illustrious mayor up for trial. Morality should be left to the church. Not an elected politician.
We live in a parallel universe, so we're not the ones to offer you advice...
Go back to the dogs Mayor, that fits your profile somewhat better. Leave the other stuff to peoples concious, not that they have any. It is just better politics.
Have the Mayor take off those rediculous sun glasses, whoever, told him he looked cool, lied to him.
We're told the mayor is hip dude. although we do not know him personally. Sunglasses are necessary in the RGV, aren't they?...- Editor
Okay, you win the argument, glasses are a necessary here in South Texas, but please, no more pictures of the Brownsville Mayor, better still send him to look for el Rosinante's Editor. No, he could do a better job saving the dogs from Brownsville, "hello," has Brownsville gone to the dawgs!!! Oh know, my mind is going bananas, I have been blogging too much on this blog full of made up characters, does the Mayor of Brownsville really exists????
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